Monday, May 5, 2008

Ok, Not That Size Anymore...Go Up!

I just spent two hours trying on clothes for a trip to my Mother's house in Northern California. I haven't seen my mom in six years. Can you imagine? All the clothes I was wearing and feeling pretty good in last summer don't fit. I have gained back about 15 lbs of the 30 lbs that I had lost in the early part of last year. I'm so bummed because, I feel and look crappy and now I have to wear the old clothes that I was wearing the last time I felt and looked crappy. None of my "cute - Ha" stuff fits.

First thing on my list when I get home is to lose that 15 lbs AGAIN. I much prefer the way I felt then. I felt prettier and much stronger.

OK, so how did I let this happen? Total slip! Started eating cereal, milk and bread again. It started in December when I made that batch of cookies for the cookie exchange, then it just escalated from there. I completely stopped counting points, writing down what I eat. I even stopped walking for a while. Since Christmas, I put 10 lbs. on, then since Gary got sick, I gained the other 5 lbs. Needed that cereal bad...total comfort food.

Since I must end this note to myself on a good note, thank goodness I didn't gain the entire 30 lbs. back. I did manage to put together a couple of outfits for my trip. I still have some cute clothes in my closet for when I do lose that 15 lbs. I've started walking again and am enjoying it. I'm getting those niggling thoughts in my mind about the desire to feel better. Those thoughts are what help me get motivated. When I get that motivated feeling, I'm good to go. I'm feeling pretty good about this. Oh, and I'm remembering that, for me, abstinence is the key...no more cereal and milk...yeek, yucky, gone, out, ptuey...no more.

I won a kit from http://lialuvsblythes.blogspot.com/
I feel kind of like a kid who knows she's going to get a present. It's so fun. I'll have a package to look forward to opening when I get home from my mom's. Then I'll have fun with new scrapbooking things to play with.
Thanks again Lia.

xokat

P.S. Not more than 15 minutes after I wrote this, my sweet sweet husband walked into the house and handed me a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup...KING SIZE...there are four of them here. Oh God, puleeze help me.

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